Identity Read online

  Origin Story to

  The South Louisiana High Book Series

  For Bonnie

  Our identity is defined again and again, by the paths we choose each day.

  -Anonymous

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Dedication

  Quote

  Prologue - Karen

  PART I - Identity’s Unraveling

  Chapter One- Karen

  Chapter Two- Tessa

  Chapter Three- Nathaniel

  Chapter Four- Karen

  Chapter Five- Nathaniel

  Chapter Six- Tessa

  Chapter Seven- Karen

  Chapter Eight- Nathaniel

  Chapter Nine- Karen

  Chapter Ten- Tessa

  PART II - Identity Revealed

  Chapter Eleven- Nathaniel

  Chapter Twelve- Karen

  Chapter Thirteen- Nathaniel

  Chapter Fourteen- Karen

  Chapter Fifteen- Nathaniel

  Chapter Sixteen- Tessa

  Chapter Seventeen- Karen

  Chapter Eighteen- Nathaniel

  Chapter Nineteen- Karen

  Chapter Twenty- Tessa

  Chapter Twenty-One- Nathaniel

  PART III - Identity

  Chapter Twenty-Two- Tessa

  Chapter Twenty-Three- Karen

  Chapter Twenty-Four- Nathaniel

  Chapter Twenty-Five- Karen

  Chapter Twenty-Six- Tessa

  Chapter Twenty-Seven- Nathaniel

  Chapter Twenty-Eight- Karen

  Chapter Twenty-Nine- Nathaniel

  Chapter Thirty- Tessa

  Epilogue - Karin

  What's next?

  Acknowledgments

  Contact E. J. Mara

  Copyright Notice

  March 11, 1997

  Esther backflips off of the beam and sticks the landing. She arches her back and lifts her hands skyward, a triumphant smile on her face. I sigh and glance down at the inch-long bruise that’s already begun to form on my thigh, a reminder of my failed attempt at what Esther’s just executed.

  “That was perfect!” Coach Mendoza says, approaching the beam. His weathered features mirror Esther’s jubilance as he claps a large hand on her shoulder. “Absolute perfection kiddo, keep it up.”

  “Thanks, I will,” she aims that smug smirk of hers at him and tucks a loose strand of her straw-colored hair behind her ear.

  I cross my arms, feeling a bit sick to my stomach.

  “Way to go, Esther!” the girl next to me shouts while a few of the other girls in my gymnastics class follow suit, clapping and whooping in Esther’s behalf.

  Okay, now I seriously want to puke.

  “Let’s take fifteen. Rehydrate, cool down, stretch, etcetera,” Coach Mendoza says. “Hey, Karen?”

  At the sound of my name, I glance up.

  “Come here,” he says, beckoning me to his side.

  My stomach tightening with nerves, I do as told. While I head his way, Esther glances at me. Our eyes meet and she averts her gaze, quickly turning her attention to one of her friends. “Lucy,” she calls as she darts away, “race you to the bench!”

  I lift my chin, determined not to let Little Miss Perfect make me feel any worse than I already do.

  Do I care if Esther Reams can’t even stand to look at me? Nope. Her snobbery is her issue, not mine.

  “Alright, Karen. I appreciate your fortitude,” Coach says, “but you need to admit when you’re hurt.”

  “What?”

  He points to the bruise on my thigh.

  I shrug. “It’s fine.”

  Coach Mendoza narrows his eyes. “It’s dangerous for an athlete not to admit when they’ve been injured. How many times have I told you that?”

  “At least five billion, because that’s how many times I’ve fallen off the beam this week,” I retort. “I’m used to bruises. I barely feel them.”

  I’m not exaggerating, I don’t feel them. What hurts more than a bruise is failure …that sick feeling that comes with seeing yourself fall so behind your teammates.

  Coach rests his hands on his hips and shakes his head, giving me a pointed look. “You’re too hard on yourself. Remember, we gave you that scholarship for a reason.” His thick mop of curly black hair jostling with every shake of his head, he continues, “You’re a natural. But to hone your abilities, you’ve got to listen to what I tell you. Alright?”

  I nod.

  “When you’re hurt, admit it.” He gives me another long look, which I return. “Now, I’m going to ask you again. Are you hurt?”

  “I’m fine. And if I wasn’t, I’d tell you ...I promise.”

  His expression softening, he nods. “Alright, Karen.”

  I turn on my heel, ready to head to my water bottle.

  “Hold up, one more thing,” Coach says.

  Just ahead, the girls in my class have gathered around the benches where we keep our water bottles and towels. To be honest, I’m glad Coach has one more thing to tell me, even if it’s to fuss at me. I’d rather spend my water break listening to his criticism than waste it listening to the dumb conversations of my teammates. Yesterday, during our water break, the girls spent the entire fifteen minutes singing theme songs from Disney movies. If there’s Karaoke in hell, I’m sure it’d be exactly like what I had to sit through.

  Coach nods to the beam. “Why do you think Esther does so well up there?”

  “Because she’s been taking gymnastics since she was two.”

  “It’s more than that,” he speaks slowly, as if he’s choosing his words with care. “It has to do with her awareness. Esther pays attention to her surroundings. You don’t.”

  “Yes I do!”

  Coach’s eyebrows go up and I realize I’ve said this louder than intended.

  Glancing down, I avoid his eyes as I explain myself, “My mom and my little sister are Deaf. I’ve been interpreting for them my whole life, and they’re constantly asking me what’s going on. So I’m, like, always hyper aware of what’s going on around me. My mom jokes ... used to joke that awareness is my super power.”

  “I know about your situation, Karen and that’s not what I mean.” Coach sighs. “You’re focused, no doubt about it. But my point is that you’re too focused on what’s going on in here.” He taps his forehead. “You need to take a moment and pay attention to where you are in time and space.”

  “I don’t understand what you mean.”

  “To put it simply,” he chuckles and runs his palm over his face, “be aware of where you are on the beam so you don’t fall off.”

  My face warms as I recall the awful moment of falling. Right after gravity pulled me down from a split jump, there was this gut-dropping sliver of a second when I realized my left foot hadn’t landed on the beam. My thigh scrapping the beam, I hit the mat and heard an audible gasp from the girls in my class. That was one of the most embarrassing moments I’ve had in gymnastics.

  Coach’s dark eyebrows go up, and ditching his smile, he speaks quickly. “Even so, I think you’re doing great for only taking gymnastics two years.”

  “Three.”

  “Three years is still nothing compared to the experience the others have. What you need to do is focus on your awareness. Stop rushing into everything. Slow down and pay attention to where you are.”

  I nod. Coach might be right. I do rush into my moves. I think I’m afraid that if I stand still, I’ll freeze up and fail to move at all.

  “So today, I want you to stay after class and work on your split jump with that in mind. Then tomorrow we’ll work on your backflip. Alright?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  Coach gives my shoulder a brief pat, and I can’t help but notice that it isn’t the warm way he clapped a han
d on Esther’s shoulder after her perfect routine. Instead, this is a short, compulsory touch. “Good. That’s all then.” He starts to his office, but turns back to me, calling over his shoulder, “Get one of the girls to stay and spot you. I can’t stay after practice today.”

  “Oh. Okay,” I reply, my stomach sinking.

  I glance back at the thirteen girls comprising my class. They’re still loitering near the benches, water bottles in hand, talking and laughing. Which one of them is going to want to stay after class and spot the weird scholarship-kid who falls off the beam every five seconds?

  I head to them, my stomach continuing to sink as I scan their faces, searching for one that has a hint of compassion. My gaze stops on Esther Reams, and at the sight of her, my hopes are doused with a fresh damper.

  If Esther, the leader of this rich-girl pack, won’t even acknowledge my existence, then I’m sure none of her minions will. She stands at the very center of the crowd, her head held high while our classmates assume their roles as her sycophantic friends, surrounding her like ladies in waiting.

  It’s disgusting, the way people with money are worshipped. I mean, sure Esther’s the best gymnast in our class, but that’s because she has the money to train with as many coaches as she wants for as long as she wants. If I had her money, I’d be as skilled as she is.

  Now that I’m close enough to hear more than giggling and indecipherable high-pitched noises, I tune into what the girls are saying.

  “…and did you see the way her leotard’s all worn in the butt? It’s so gross,” a girl named Heather whispers, her green eyes sparkling as she speaks in between titters of laughter.

  “I swear to God,” another girl, Lucy, says in a stage whisper, “Karen wears the same leotard to every practice. Look at it! That wedgie-machine is the same one she wore yesterday.”

  As my name leaves Lucy’s lips, my heart drops and warmth floods my face and neck.

  “What are we even talking about? Who’s Karen?” Esther asks while her friends laugh.

  Mortified, I grab a water bottle from the nearby ice chest and turn away from the giggling. Apparently, they still haven’t noticed that I’m within earshot, because now they’re not even bothering to whisper as someone fills Esther in on who I am.

  My breath becomes a ball that’s stuck in the back of my throat. Forcing myself to calm down, I take a swig of water and turn to the mirrors lining the wall at my left.

  Matthew’s Gymnastics used to be a dance studio before the owner, a former gymnast named Earl Matthews, converted it into a gymnastics training center. Mr. Matthews keeps saying he’s going to remove the remaining mirrors, but he has yet to do so. I’m glad they’re still lining the walls because, as Lucy so eloquently pointed out, due to outgrowing all three of my leotards, there’s always something on my person that needs to be readjusted.

  Right now for example, I do look like I’m wearing a wedgie-machine. I fix my leotard and my gaze returns to Esther and her friends.

  “…so what are we watching tonight? Independence Day or Twister?” Esther asks as she smooths down her already perfect dirty blonde hair.

  Lucy shakes her head. “No! Romeo and Juliet! Remember? Last time you promised we’d watch Romeo and Juliet next!”

  “Fine, whatev’,” Esther says with a shrug. “So we’ll watch two movies. And how about we get take-out from The Olive Garden this time? Their breadsticks are like crack, I literally…”

  An unsettling hollowness forming in the pit of my stomach, I turn away from their conversation, leave the benches, and start for the boys’ side of the floor.

  It’s not that it hurts to be so blatantly left out. It’s that I like to master things. And clearly, when it comes to mastering social challenges, I suck.

  Every other kid at Matthew’s Gymnastics has scored an invitation to one of Esther’s famous movie nights. Even the boys get invited. She hosts them a couple of times each month, and I’ve heard they’re awesome because her house is a veritable mansion. They say her parents are always out of town too. Of course I can only go by what I’ve heard, being that I’ve never been invited. And even if I were, it’s not like my dad would let me go. Even though he’s hardly ever home to care what my little sister and I are up to, when he is around he’s ridiculously overprotective about letting us hang out with other people. So, I’m used to being on my own, and Esther’s refusal to acknowledge me isn’t that big of a deal.

  I pad across the floor and reaching out my hand, let it graze one of the high bar’s poles as I pass it.

  Actually, I guess I do kind of feel left out. It’s not that I don’t understand why someone like me doesn’t make a bleep on Esther’s radar. I get it. I’m here on a scholarship (a while back Peake High School had a deal with Matthew’s Gymnastics that every four years Mr. Matthews would give one “needy” student with athletic potential a four-year scholarship. My freshman year, I was that needy student), my leotards are too small and faded, and there’s the small fact that these kids think my family is beyond weird. So, I understand that I’m not the happy-go-lucky, money-falling-out-of-her-ears prepster who Esther would invite into her circle. But understanding why I’m shunned doesn’t stop it from hurting.

  I pad past the rings and enter the boys’ territory, trying to ignore the sting of dejection that’s creeping into my mood.

  The boys’ half of the floor is similar to ours, but it sounds different; it’s much louder due to the amount of talking and goofing off. Unlike our coach, the boy’s instructor, Coach Peterson, is lax about letting the other guys talk and hang out when he’s focused on working with just a couple of them. And despite Coach Peterson’s laid back attitude, the guys do really well at meets-especially Nathaniel Colbert.

  Esther is the best of the girls and Nathaniel is the best of the boys.

  While Coach Peterson patiently works with two boys on the pommel horse, I scan the surrounding gymnasts for Nathaniel and spot him at the tub of chalk. At the sight of him, relief washes over me. I start towards him, my ebbing mood already beginning to improve.

  There’s not a chance any of the girls in my class will be willing to stay late and spot me, but I bet Nathaniel will. He’s, hands down, the nicest hearing person I’ve ever met.

  When I first started coming to Matthew’s Gymnastics, Nathaniel hung out with me on breaks, and on the many nights Dad would forget to pick me up, Nathaniel was quick to offer me a ride home.

  I smooth down my hair and give my leotard a quick tug at the butt.

  To be honest, his kindness took me by surprise. I’ve gone to school with Nathaniel since sixth grade and we’d never said much to each other. Besides that, with his dark hair, perpetual tan, and dreamy hazel eyes, he’s super-hot. So I naturally assumed that, like most of the wealthy, good-looking guys at Peake High, he’d be a jerk. But I couldn’t have been more wrong.

  Taking a deep breath, I hope my too-tight leotard will stay put for at least the next five minutes and return my attention to Nathaniel. His dark brown hair is already growing out of the Caesar-style haircut he got a few weeks ago. It’s growing almost as fast as he is. These days it seems like he gets taller and more muscular every time I look at him.

  A serious look on his face, he dusts his hands with far too much chalk and accidently gets a ton of it in his hair.

  I can’t help but smile.

  He looks up, spots me, and his eyes light up.

  “You have chalk in your hair,” I point out.

  He leans forward and shakes out his hair, but this does nothing.

  I laugh. “I’ll get it.”

  He grins and stoops so I don’t have to stand on my tiptoes.

  Just last year we were practically the same height. And now, a mere three months later, he’s shot up to six feet. Lightly biting the inside of my cheek, I lean towards him and try to ignore the flutter that runs through my chest.

  “So, the town vigilante struck again. Did you hear the latest story?” I ask as I run my fingers through
his soft brown hair, dusting away the chalk. “I heard it on the radio on the way here. They’re calling it, ‘The Unseen Adventures Continue’.”

  “Nah, I missed that one. What happened?” he asks.

  And then there’s that-the deeper voice that came with the height.

  “Got it. You’re chalk free.”

  “Thanks.” Nathaniel stands, straightening to his full height as he crosses his arms. “So, who did Unseen save this time?”

  “This time,” I say, “some guy who lost custody of his kid brought a gun to Peake Skating Rink, where she was having her birthday party. So there were all these kids there when he busts in waving a gun around, saying he’s going to take his daughter with him. Then out of nowhere he gets punched in the face by ‘something that appeared to be invisible’, even though some witnesses claim they saw a flash of a figure with glowing eyes. Then, some reporter asked one of the Sherriff if this proved that Unseen’s real, and of course the Sherriff refused to comment.”

  Nathaniel sighs. “When are they just going to admit the dude’s real?”

  “I know,” I say. But my thoughts drift to a brief conversation I had with my dad a few months back ...Mom and Tessa Jr., my little sister, were both still asleep, so our house was unusually quiet as my father and I sat at the table eating breakfast. I was reading the newspaper while he, barely touching his cereal, frantically jotted some formula or whatever into one of the notebooks he’s always carrying. Meanwhile, I came across an article about Unseen rescuing a family from a burning building. I was so impressed that I started reading it out loud. But three sentences in, Dad shut me up with, “No. Stop. Stop!” I asked him why and he shook his head. “Because it’s implausible nonsense.”

  So I figure that if my father, a high school science teacher with a PhD in biology and a penchant for sci-fi shows like The X-Files, calls the idea of Unseen “ implausible nonsense,” then it’s certainly understand for the police to, likewise, question the existence of our town’s “supernatural” vigilante.

  “Well, my dad doesn’t think Unseen’s real,” I say, glancing at Nathaniel, “and he’s the smartest person I know. I mean, we are talking about an invisible superhero. The whole idea’s pretty out there.”